SCRAP PAPER.

[Bella]

I really like both of those, Iter Tempus especially.

As for the, uh, taglines... something something The Story of Leopard of Cupertino something Operating Systems, Part Two, something about traveling from Armonk to Boston, the Capital of the Culture of Machines?

[NejinOniwa]

Written By Mac OSX 10.5 Leopard of Cupertino
P2
In Which I Travel to Boston, Armonk and Other Places of High Computer Culture

Pretty much. -w-

[Nichi]

Here we are; the first chapter of Tales of Insanity

Chapter 1: Why you don't mess with Sara

A long time ago in a town called Kickapoo, there lived a boy named James; no older than 11 at the time. Unlike his fellow schoolmates, he wasn't very popular; not only for the fact he didn't like sports and still played with his old Nintendo 64 in a time when everybody was nuts over PlayStation 2, but because he wore glasses and didn't have a crew cut like all the other little Borg his age.

Unfortunately, for having hair longer than 1\8" combined with the fact he wasn't covered in scars from playing football in the streets with no protective gear, many people assumed he was really a girl. As much as this annoyed him, it did lead to his friendship with Sara; the resident tomboy, who preferred a baggy shirt and cargo jeans over fancy dresses, liked keeping her hair short, and was commonly mistaken for a boy (Not that she minded this fact).

Since his parents and older sister where away on vacation, which he ended up staying behind because his ticket was lost, James had the house to himself; enjoying a warm August morning repairing his PC, before heading to the park to meet up with Sara.

James: Ok, that should fix that problem with the fan...

He then proceeded to turn his PC on, as it sprang to life with the fan spinning properly; it no longer making that loud grinding sound that had persisted for the past several years. Once it was finished booting, he was greeted by none other than the Windows 98 desktop; with a notice on screen that he had an e-mail waiting for him. Checking it, it was a message from Sara; probably letting him know she was about to wait for him at the park. He proceeded to check the message; finding that according to it, Sara was being held captive by some random guy in a Dracula costume.

James: That's...a bit random

He proceeded to put his PC into Sleep mode; as he went outside, got on his bike, and proceeded to head to Sara's house, which wasn't too far away. Once he arrived, he found that the front door was wide open; as he carefully went inside...only to find Sara was tying up the guy who tried to capture her.

Sara (In a calm, casual tone): What took you so long?

James: I just got the message not long ago; I was upgrading my PC earlier

Sara: Well, that explains everything...except why a random guy in a Dracula costume would show up and capture me

Guy in a Dracula Costume: It's just another part of Master Adam's plan; soon, he will unleash his army of sanity-sucking robots and turn this place into a crazy world

Sara: Why would he want to make things even crazier than they already are?

Guy in a Dracula Costume: I don't know; he doesn't want to reveal the true nature of his plans

Sara: More importantly, how would capturing me help with his plans?

Guy in a Dracula Costume: Don't you know? A damsel in distress is the staple of any good evil plan!

James: Although in this case, it backfired on you

Guy in a Dracula Costume: Well, I didn't expect her to resist...

Sara: Why didn't you try fighting back, instead of giving me an easy victory?

Guy in a Dracula Costume: Because I left my bazooka at home. Give me a break, here

Sara: Now, how can we stop Adam's plan?

Guy in a Dracula Costume: I don't know much; I heard something about a collection of floppy disks...

Sara: All right...James, you look to find more info

James: What about the guy you tied up?

Sara: I'll turn him loose in a moment

Guy in a Dracula Costume: But that'll give me a chance to report back to Adam about what you're planning; which could ruin your plans of stopping him

Sara: You have a point, but this will make things a little more exciting; it beats finishing our quest with nothing trying to stop us

She then proceeds to untie the guy, as he proceeded to quickly run for the door; stopping in the doorway.

Guy in a Dracula Costume: Remember this as the day you almost caught me; the guy in a Dracula Costume! BLAH!

He then proceeds to run off really quickly, as James and Sara began to discuss what just happened.

James: Well...that was random

Sara: Yeah...besides, why would your older cousin want to rid the world of sanity?

James: Wait; how can we be sure that this "Master Adam" is the same Adam I'm related to?

Sara: Think about it; how many other Adams do you know in this small town?

James: Good point; this town seems to have some kind of unspoken rule against having more than one person with the same name

Sara: Now, what do you think we should do?

James: We should probably try to find more information on what his plans are; which will likely also give us information on how to stop him

Sara: Yeah

The two then proceeded to head back to James' house; getting online as soon as they got home to try and find some information on what's going on.

In the next chapter: Their quest begins, as a familiar face joins them...

[Aurora Borealis]

@Bella: I just read the latest chapter, very interesting that Unix shows compassion towards old, disenfranchised computer/OS-tans, but is very Darwinist towards her family. From your knowledge of the Unix OSes, which of her descendants reached the top of the hierarchy, which ones fell into obscurity or died?

Wouldn't you say that despite the damage that the Unix Wars caused to her and her family, the wars in some sense served a purpose to determine which of her daughters would thrive or not? Not that I'm saying she deliberately caused them... ^^;

Curiously, Unix didn't contact the Apple Family when A/UX-tan was born. Did Unix really forget about her (self-fulfilling prophecy? A/UX fell into obscurity!), or assume that she going to be one more descendant to turn against her/be torn apart in the Unix Wars?

[Bella]

@Nej: Thanks for the translation (as you can see I have a ways to go before I'm fluent in Latin...)

@Bella: I just read the latest chapter, very interesting that Unix shows compassion towards old, disenfranchised computer/OS-tans, but is very Darwinist towards her family. From your knowledge of the Unix OSes, which of her descendants reached the top of the hierarchy, which ones fell into obscurity or died?

Wouldn't you say that despite the damage that the Unix Wars caused to her and her family, the wars in some sense served a purpose to determine which of her daughters would thrive or not? Not that I'm saying she deliberately caused them... ^^;

Well, she DID finance the construction of the Binteji Renmei and seems to care about the fate of old OS-tans ... yet she's never shown much compassion toward her own kids. The Unixes that reached the top of the hierarchy are ones like BSD, Solaris, UnixWare and AIX, while there are probably too many that fell into obscurity to count... :/

You're quite correct about the Unix Wars separating the weaklings from the strong ones. Though at the same time it probably weakened her family as a whole, since, while the strong were made stronger, it killed the livelihoods of (or just plain killed) a lot of less-popular Unixes. It also allowed Linux to "infiltrate" their market, which wasn't good for any of the Unixes (save Solaris, perhaps).

Curiously, Unix didn't contact the Apple Family when A/UX-tan was born. Did Unix really forget about her (self-fulfilling prophecy? A/UX fell into obscurity!), or assume that she going to be one more descendant to turn against her/be torn apart in the Unix Wars?

That was an oversight on my part, lol. .___.; Though I like your theories.

[Aurora Borealis]

So Unix is equally apathetic to her highest-ranked daughters? No wonder why so many OS-tans see her as a complete monster! (This is assuming they also don't know about her contributions to the Binteeji Renmei...)

Here are my guesses about the family hierarchy, and fates of various Unices (this list may also include Unix-likes):

high-ranked: Solaris, BSD, UnixWare, AIX, Nexenta (a hybrid Unix-Linux OS), HP-UX, OSX Leopard?
died: Xenix, Amix, RISC iX, Spring OS
fell into obscurity: A/UX, GNU/HURD, DG/UX, VxWorks, OS-9, OSF/1,  (these are low-ranked in the Unix family hierarchy)
defected: NeXTSTEP, Plan 9 (+ Plan B and Octopus), the Open Source BSDs
other: QNX (became successful despite obscurity, left the Unix faction after the wars were over), SCO Unix (not well-respected within the family, but still somehow high-ranked)

not sure: Domain/OS (no longer supported, but had some influence), Xinu, TUNIS

There's also an irony in the fact that her most successful daughters still in the LUC are commercial and proprietary- two things she didn't use to stand for!

------

Ironically, A/UX-tan deciding not to fight in the wars cost her opportunity at success within the family. She didn't show off her abilities, so she was forgotten. I also don't see VxWorks as being high-ranked because she doesn't seem like the type who would have ever gotten involved in the wars. She's too much of an adventurer to consider such thing! XD

That was an oversight on my part, lol. .___.; Though I like your theories.

Personally, I feel tempted to go with the second interpretation. The Unix Wars started in the late 80's, right? A/UX-tan debuted around that time (early '88), and Unix may have assumed she'd grow up to be just another descendant who will hate her guts (having grown up during the wars), so she didn't bother visiting.

[Bella]

@Unix hierarchy - that looks about right, actually. Xinu, TUNIS, and the rest of the academic/research Unices I imagine would be in lower/middle positions on the hierarchy, depending on how Unix feels about them. (IE, MERT would be "low", CB Unix might be "middle"... not sure though.)

And that sounds right about A/UX, too.

...
...

COMING THIS DECEMBER:




SAGE & INFERNO-CHAN IN THE MOST OUTRAGEOUS BUDDY COMEDY EVER!

[NejinOniwa]

Currently in progress: writing about little girl being read a bedtime story by her mom. And MY ENTIRE HEAD IS FULL OF D'AWWWWWWWW.

[Nichi]

Here is chapter 2 of Tales of Insanity. This is the one where a familiar face joins James and Sara on their quest...

Chapter 2: Outdated Technology
After searching online for about 30 minutes, sifting through seemingly hundreds of unrelated websites (How a "Free Paperclips" offer is related to their search, we may never know), they finally found the information they wanted; located on none other than Adam's website, tucked away deep within the dusty labyrinth that is Geocities.

Sara: He still uses Geocities?

James: Yes. He also still swears by America Online and a 28.8K internet connection

Sara: He should really get with the times and upgrade to 56K

James: I know; it doesn't get much better than 56K...anyway, from what I can gather, we can find the location for Adam's fortress by going to some random locations and gathering together some assorted floppy disks that contain directions to the next disk in the set and to the fortress

Sara: That's nice of him; leaving some disks lying around to help us find his fortress

James: He mentions the first in the series is located at the carnival that's in town right now

Sara: They should be opening up soon; we should probably go ahead and leave

James: To the Batmobile!

The two then rushed toward the garage; where they found a small 2-seated go-kart, painted black and with a Batman decal on the front, waiting for them with the keys already in the ignition. Next to it was a smaller, 1-seated go-kart that was painted green; with no decals on it at all.

Sara: Do I get to drive this time?

James: You can drive it next time; we'll switch out as needed

Sara: Ok...

The two then get into the go-kart and start it up, as the garage door opens and the take off; heading toward the carnival. Traffic was light, as they arrived in minutes; finding the place surprisingly deserted, considering that they where open for business according to their signs, but when you have an archway above your entrance that says "Carnival of Doom" on it, it tends to scare off most customers. Cautiously, they got out of the go-kart and proceeded to do an equipment check.

Sara: All right, did you remember to bring a weapon?

James: Um...

Sara: You forgot your Boomerang Blade, didn't you?

James: Yeah...kind of

Sara: At least I remembered to bring my mallet

She then reached into her pocket and pulls out a very large wooden mallet; one that's head is twice the side of the tires on the go-kart they just rode in on.

James: How, exactly, did you fit such a large mallet in your pocket?

Sara: Trust me; there's plenty of room for things even bigger than that. You'd be surprised what I can fit in there...

James: That's why you prefer cargo pants over a skirt?

Sara: Of course...although, you still need a weapon

James: I'll just use the first thing I find that looks like it'd work well; I'll get my Boomerang Blade when we return to the base after getting the disk

Sara: Why would we go back to the house? Wouldn't it make more sense to keep going, instead of giving Adam more time to complete his evil plan?

James: Because we can't look at the disk without going back. I don't have my laptop with me, since my sister felt the need to take it with her on vacation

Sara (with a sigh): Ok...

The two then walked through the gates, when they found a sign waiting in the middle of the walkway; one that directly addressed them, telling them where they needed to go next.

James: All right, we first have to go to the ferries wheel; where apparently, somebody is waiting on us

Sara: This sounds like a trap...

James: It can't be; the sign clearly said "Not a Trap" in bold letters

Sara: Well, there's only one way to find out...

The two marched onward toward the ferries wheel; Sara keeping her mallet in hand, while James was completely defenseless because of his own forgetfulness. As they got closer, they noticed a person waiting for them; one who looked older than them, with hair a little shorter than James, wearing glasses, a green sport jacket, and some denim jeans.

Unknown person: You must have seen my sign...

Sara: Who are you?

Unknown person: I'm Rodney McIntosh, the Director. There's no need to introduce yourselves; I already know you're James and Sara. Pretty creepy, isn't it? Anyway, I came to deliver something of great importance to you, but some strange person took the item, stole my bus, and placed a curse on me before I could get it to you

Sara: What was it, anyway?

Rodney: I don't know; it was a small, plain cardboard box that had a note attached to it saying to deliver it to you

James: Do you know what the curse was?

Rodney: According to that person, the curse has damaged my ability to transform into anyone at will; causing me to unwillingly transform at random. Sometimes, I can hold whatever my current form may be for days, and sometimes I can barely sustain it for an hour.

James: Well, that's weird...how can you transform, anyway?

Rodney: It takes a long time to train to master the ability, but once you do, it can prove useful for many things

Sara: Do you know where we need to go to next?

Rodney: You'll need to make your way to the Big Tent on the other end of the carnival grounds. To get there, you'll have to cut through the Tunnel of Love; were an army of crocodiles will likely attack.

James: Well, we better start heading that way

Rodney: I'll come with you; you'll likely need my help, and maybe it'll lead me to that person who cursed me

Sara: All right, but you better not slow us down

Rodney: Of course I won't, when I have this by my side

He then reaches into his pocket and somehow pulls out a huge sword from it; one with a sparkling blade made of a light blue crystal.

Rodney: I never go anywhere without my Crystal Sword, although I've recently started carrying a bow with plenty of arrows with me just in case I need to fight from long-range

James: You wouldn't happen to have a weapon I could borrow, do you?

Rodney: I have a Boomerang Blade you can use

James: You do? I'll take it!

Rodney: All right

He then reached into his pocket once more, and pulled out none other than a Boomerang Blade; one almost exactly like the one James uses normally, except this one appears to be much sharper and also feels a little lighter.

Rodney: What do you think?

James: It's awesome; better than the one I use

Rodney: That's because this one was forged in the fires of Death Mountain by a master blacksmith

James: Cool...now, let's go

With their new addition, Sara led the group onward toward the Tunnel of Love; arriving at the docks within minutes.

James: Do we really have to cut through here, or can we go around?

Sara: What's wrong?

James: I really don't want to go in there

Sara: Come on; it won't be that bad

James: How can you be so sure?

Sara: Come with us, or I'll tell Rodney here about the incident at the bridal shop; even showing him the funny pictures I took of what happened

James: All right, I'll come along...just don't tell him about it, please; I'd prefer to forget that ever happened

Rodney: What was this incident, anyway?

James: Let's just say that what happens in the bridal shop stays in the bridal shop...

Rodney: So, if we took you there, you'll tell us everything?

James: ...Let's just continue our quest

The group then got into the swan-shaped boat and proceeded to row the boat into the tunnel. Because there was so little light, the place took on a much creepier appearance than it normally would; as they continued their way through the long tunnel of statues that appeared happy to the point it comes off as really creepy. As they continued through, they felt something hit the bottom of the boat; shaking it.

James: Did anybody else feel that?

Sara: I did...

Rodney: Either it was just a rock that's sticking up very high, or there's something in the water...

Suddenly, his hands began to glow strangely; which caught the attention of the rest of his group.

James: Are you ok...?

Rodney: I'm about to transform again; this shouldn't take too long...

The glowing then began to spread; as he was eventually engulfed in a bright light that lit the entire cave and scared the crocodiles back into the shadows.

Sara: $20 says he'll turn into a girl

James: Make it $40 and you've got yourself a bet

The two then watched as the light began to die down, as they noticed that a girl was sitting exactly where Rodney was; one with shoulder-length brunette hair, who was wearing a maid costume with a short but puffy skirt, fancy black shoes, and an apron with the strings tied into a gigantic bow in the back.

Random girl: Ok...wait; the voice...I'm a girl?

She then looked down; taking notice of the frilly maid costume she was wearing.

Random girl: I'm also wearing a maid costume? This is the best unintentional transformation ever

James: I take it you're still Rodney, right?

Random girl: Of course; I did mention that I was about to transform, didn't I?

James: To be honest, I though you where just a little crazy when you mentioned transforming

Rodney: Trust me; transforming like this seems normal after the weird things I've seen in the past

James: Where do you come from, anyway?

Rodney: I'll explain once we're finished here

Sara: By the way, James; where's my $40?

James: Oh yeah...

He then reached into his pocket and pulled out two $20 bills and handed them to Sara; who gladly took them.

Sara: That's the easiest $40 I've ever made

Rodney: You where taking bets on my transformation?

James: It was her idea; I just went along with it. Anyway, here's our stop

They then saw the end of the tunnel and the dock within inches of their boat; as they quickly got off and exited the tunnel. On the other side, they saw a gigantic tent right in front of them; one that had a banner hung above its entrance that read "Got Orthopedic Underwear?"

Sara: I have a quick question, Rodney...

Rodney: Yes?

Sara: How can you stand wearing a dress?

Rodney: Firstly, it's not a dress; it's a maid costume, which is much cooler. Secondly, it's actually easy to move in and is pretty comfortable

Sara: I don't see how you can think that; on the rare occasion I'm forced to wear a dress, I always find it hard to move in and uncomfortable. I also hate how there are never any pockets on them; meaning no places for me to easily hide things

James: Can we stop talking about clothes and continue our mission?

The group, weapons in hand, proceed to walk through the entrance of the big tent; finding it very dark inside; just barely visible where the stands, which created a perfect circle around the edge of the tent. Cautiously, the three kept close as they slowly walked toward the center of the room; keeping watch for anything out of the ordinary. Suddenly, they heard a booming voice come from above, like somebody speaking into a megaphone, which caught the group off-guard.

Unknown person: Welcome, girls and boy, to your worst nightmare...

Within seconds, all the lights in the tent turned on at the same time; temporarily blinding the group, as they heard someone land on the ground not far from them and begin to slowly walk closer to them. Once they where able to see again, they where able to see that the unknown person was a really creepy clown who also appeared very strong; his other defining feature being a grin on his face that made the Joker look sane.

James: Who are you?

Clown: I am known by many names; some call me Mr. Tinkertrain, others call me "the thing that should not be", but I personally prefer to use my real name; Breadfan

Sara: You're involved with Adam, aren't you?

Breadfan: Of course; I'm one of the Guardians of the 4 Disks; given the duty of ensuring that you will not succeed in your quest

Rodney: Let's see about that...

Breadfan: Are you seriously challenging me to a battle? If you are, than bring it on!

He then proceeded to get out a staff and assumed a fighting stance, as the others charged into battle. Sara managed to get in the first hit with a strong blow from her mallet, which left Breadfan dazed momentarily; allowing Rodney to get in a few good blows while James slipped in a few attacks of his own from afar. Eventually, their foe recovered, as he proceeded to swing his arms with great force; sending both Rodney and Sara flying into the stands on opposite sides of the tent, which knocked both out.

Breadfan: Now it's just you and I

James: I honestly didn't know that. Thank you, Captain Obvious

In rage, Breadfan charged forward like a bull; as James effortlessly dodged the attack and allowed his foe to run straight into one of the poles supporting the tent; knocking him out with a satisfying metallic thud. Shortly after, the first disk appeared out of nowhere, hovering right in front of him. He quickly took it and put it away in his pocket, as he noticed that Sara and Rodney had gotten back up.

Rodney: Note to self; be careful around clowns...

Sara: Did you get the disk, James?

James: Of course; I have it in my pocket right now

Rodney: We just need 3 more now

James: All right; back to the base!

Sara: I'm driving this time!

James: Ok

Sara: Also, Rodney will ride with me; since he doesn't know where the base is

Rodney: Thanks; that's one of the few things I don't know about

James: If she--I mean, he goes with you, than how am I supposed to get back? The other go-kart is back at the base

Sara: I don't know. Maybe you can find a turbo-charged tricycle lying around

The two then proceeded to drive off, as James began to search around for something to use to get back to the base...

Next time, the plot thickens...

[Nichi]

Here we are, with chapter 3 of Tales of Insanity

Chapter 3: Age of Insanity

The next day, after James got some much needed rest following his long trek back to the base, the group was sitting around in the living room; talking with each other over breakfast.

James: There's something I've been wondering, Rodney...

Rodney: Yes?

James: You're obviously not of this world, so where did you come from?

Rodney: You probably wouldn't believe me

James: After what I saw yesterday, I'd believe anything

Sara: Yeah; between your transformation and a random guy in a Dracula costume attempting to capture me, anything seems possible now

Rodney: All right, I'll tell you. I come from another universe from this one; one that's not too different from yours, except mine seems to be 8 years ahead of yours. While it's currently August 2002 here, its August 2010 back home

James: So, how did you end up here?

Rodney: It all started a few months following my last adventure; I was sorting through some things in Storage Building 12 with my two assistants, 2k-tan and Yendor, when we stumbled onto a plain cardboard box we didn't recognize and wasn't listed in our inventory. Upon closer inspection, I found a note taped to the bottom of the box; one that showed a picture of you two, saying "Please deliver this package to James and Sara" before it began to give the directions needed to get to this world

James: So, where does the mysterious person come in?

Rodney: I'm getting there...anyway, I got into my magic bus and proceeded to head to this universe, figuring that this would be a quick trip and I'd be returning home before I knew it. Once I arrived, I proceeded to make a sign and placed it at the entrance to let you know to meet me there; somehow knowing that you'd show up soon. However, as I waited, a mysterious person showed up and attacked while I was off-guard; stealing my bus and the box, while placing a curse on me that results in a loss of control of my transformation powers. About a day later, having transformed into a Pikachu and then back to my normal self during that time period, you two showed up.

James: What happens next?

Sara: We already know what happens next; we where there, remember?

James: Oh yeah...

Rodney: I was studying the contents of that disk last night, and fond two things of note; one file, containing what appears to be a fragment of a map, and a second file listing where the next disk in the series is hidden. This is almost too easy

James: So, where's the next disk?

Rodney: It's located in the funeral home on the other side of town

Sara: What are we waiting for? Let's go!

Rodney: I can take the green go-kart

James: No complaints there; I prefer my Batmobile

The group then went to the garage, got into their go-karts, and took off toward the funeral home. They arrived fairly quickly, finding the place deserted as they ventured inside the unlocked front door. Carefully, the three began to walk in, sticking close together in case Adam has set a trap for them...which, of course, he has; as they ventured into the foyer, the door behind them slammed shut and locked, as a creepy-looking man in a fancy suit appeared before them.

Unknown man: I assume you're here on a mission to defeat me and obtain the disk I'm holding onto for Master Adam...

Rodney: Of course...now who are you?

Unknown man: I am the 2nd member of the Guardians of the 4 Disks; Mr. Crowley, the miracle man. Now, it's only formal that you three introduce yourselves before we begin

James: I am James; the hero

Sara: I am Sara; the lancer...although, seeing as I'm more of a leader, I should be the hero instead

Rodney: I am known by many names, but to keep things simple, I am Gardenia; the Directress

Sara (whispering): What's with the name change?

Rodney (whispering): It saves me from explaining my malfunctioning transformation powers to him. Just go with it, ok?

Mr. Crowley: With our introductions out of the way, we can begin. Prepare to go into a deep sleep

James, Sara, and Rodney: What?

Mr. Crowley: Sweet dreams...

He then pulled a gas mask out of his pocket and put it on, as sleep gas began to flood the room. While James and Sara went out cold, Rodney pushed on through the drowsiness to try and attack his foe; pulling out his bow and arrow and tried to take aim. However, he was barely able to focus on his target, firing off a shot that missed by inches before collapsing on the ground.

Several hours later, Rodney woke back up; finding himself, along with Sara and James, tied to a post, as Mr. Crowley looked upon them with a look of amusement on his face.

Mr. Crowley: Now, I can finally unleash the army of robots that Master Adam designed with no one to stop me, since you're all tied up. In fact, you three with have the honor of being among the first people to have their sanity removed...

Rodney: You won't get away with this; we'll somehow break out and stop you

Mr. Crowley: I'd love to see you try, my dear Gardenia...

Casually, he walked over to a fancy desk in the northern part of the room and pressed the red button on top; which caused the doors on the eastern wall to slide open, as a group of robots who look like cheap knock-offs of the Daleks began to roll in.

Robot #1: Exterminate sanity!

They then turned toward Mr. Crowley and went after him; much to his shock.

Mr. Crowley: I am on your side; your target is over there

Robot #2: Target acquired; prepare for sanity removal

Mr. Crowley (panicking): I am not your target!

Robot #1: All sanity must be exterminated

As he tried to escape, he was cornered by one of the Dalek-like robots; which extended its arm that looks like a toilet plunger toward the head of Mr. Crowley, who was helpless on the floor as the robot began to absorb the sanity from his mind. From all the noise, James and Sara woke up.

James: What's going on?

Rodney: He's unleashed Adam's sanity-sucking robots; and they have made him one of their first targets

Sara: What about us?

Rodney: If we don't find some way to break free, we'll be next

Sara: If only you could have turned into someone who'd actually be useful right now, instead of a maid

Rodney: Hey; maids are cool

James: Could you argue about this later, and try to find a way out of this now?

Suddenly, they saw the robots in the room stop dead in their tracks; as if time was frozen. Not long after, they felt the ropes binding them together tall to the ground, as they heard the voice of of an unknown woman behind them.

Unknown woman: I think that will work

Rodney then turned around to see who it was; finding a lady with long green hair, wearing a baggy jacket and pants, holding a dagger in one hand.

As Rodney looked at this mysterious person, he realized in shock who it was.

Rodney: You're the person who stole that package and my magic bus!

Unknown person: Yes; which, I not only have the package, but I have the other important thing I needed...

Stepping out of the way, the group saw another lady tied up on the ground; one with short blue hair with a maid headdress in it, who was wearing glasses, a long blue coat with a blue ribbon tied in a fancy bow around the collar, flat-soled thigh-high boots, and a leotard colored red, green, blue, and yellow underneath the coat. While James and Sara had no idea who this person was, Rodney quickly recognized her at none other than 2k-tan; his trusted assistant.

Rodney: Nichi!

2k-tan: Wait...you're Rodney, right?

Rodney: Of course it's me

2k-tan: Than, why do you look like Gardenia right now?

Rodney: To make a long story short, this lady has placed a curse on me that has caused total loss of control over my transformation powers. To be honest, I don't mind this form; maids are cool

Unknown person: I have a name, you know; it's Mary

Rodney: What are you planning?

Mary: I've been sent on a special mission by Adam to make things a little more...interesting, by bringing your beloved assistant into the equation

Rodney: If you do anything to harm 2k, than you'll come to regret it

Mary: I'm not going to harm her...not yet, at least. If you want to see her again, you'll have to come to Adam's fortress. Now, if you excuse me, we'll be on our way. Mind the robots on your way out...

As quickly as she arrived, Mary disappeared in a flash; taking 2k-tan with her, as the robots began to move once more and the next disk appeared in front of Sara. Quickly taking it, she and the rest of her group ran outside; escaping from the robots and Mr. Crowley, who was lying on the ground talking about seeing naked cowgirls floating across the ceiling. Getting back into their go-karts, they quickly rushed back to the base; where they continued their conversation.

Rodney: Well, things have gotten much worse...

James: Who was that lady that was tied up?

Rodney: That would be 2k-tan; one of my assistants

Sara: She must be important to you

Rodney: Of course; we've been through a lot together over the past few years, so we've become a bit protective of each other

Sara: We at least have the 2nd disk now; we're half-way there

Rodney: Yeah...I'll study the next disk; you two can get some rest

Next time, they fetch the 3rd disk, as Rodney transforms again

[Nichi]

Chapter 4 of TOI is go!

Chapter 4: The Amazing Maze

The next day, Sara got up early; finding Rodney passed out on the floor from spending the entire night studying the information on the two disks, piecing together the fragments of the map he has so far and with a window up containing a bunch of notes. However, rest didn't come easy; as it was obvious to Sara that that something in Rodney's dreams was disturbing him. He woke up not long later, sweating, as Sara came closer to figure out what's going on.

Rodney: ...We've got to find the next 2 disks, and fast

Sara: I take it you dream involved 2k-tan somehow

Rodney: Yeah. It may be a stretch, but I think it might be a sign of bad things to come if we don't hurry

Sara: What happened in it?

Rodney: I was tied up in a place I didn't recognize, as I could only watch helplessly as someone I didn't recognize killed 2k-tan. If that is a sign of things to come, than I have to find a way to keep it from happening; I can't lose 2k, no matter the cost

Sara: Not only that, but we still have Adam and his army of sanity-sucking robots to deal with. If we don't take care of him quick enough, than we'll literally be living in a crazy world

Rodney: Well, we've got a lot to work on. Go wake up James, while I get together the info on the location of the 3rd disk

After a long struggle to get him out of bed, Sara was finally successful in waking up James after nearly 10 minutes, as they went into the living room to meet up with Rodney.

Rodney: I see you're finally awake...

James: I was sleeping well until you woke me up

Rodney: If only I could have slept well...anyway, our next disk is located in the nearly abandoned mall. It's less than 2 miles from here, so it won't take long to get there at all

The group then went to the garage, got into their go-karts, and preceded to head over to the nearly abandoned mall. Nearly abandoned was right; there was literally only one store in that entire mall that was still open, along with the fact that few people even went to that place anymore. Once they arrived, they went inside; finding that somebody had turned the place into a complicated labyrinth of mirrors.

James: I can find our way through this maze, no problem!

Rodney: All right then; you can lead the way

With James leading the party, the group ventured into the maze. Before they got very far in, James noticed a strange light coming from behind him; turning around to see that Rodney's hands where starting to glow again.

James: About to transform again?

Rodney: Yes, unfortunately...I was enjoying this form, too

Sara: Why?

Rodney: Maid costumes are cool, that's why

The glowing then finished spreading, as he was then engulfed by the light; which didn't quite seem as bright as last time, since this maze was more well lit than that tunnel was a while back.

James: $20 says he turns into a were-ferret

Sara: I'll pass this time

The light began to die down, as they saw that Rodney had turned into a Japanese schoolboy of roughly high school age; one with short but messy dark blue hair, wearing a black school uniform with a patch that looks like the BMW logo on the left side of the jacket, with "Gekkoukan High School" written around the edge. Glancing at the mirror to his right, Rodney noticed who he'd become, and didn't seem to have too much of a problem with it.

Rodney: Cool; maybe I have an Evoker in my jacket, so I can summon my Persona—wait a minute; that game won't exist for another 5 years...

Sara: What game?

Rodney: Persona 3

Sara: There's going to be a Persona 3?

Rodney: Yes; eventually...

Sara: Good. I loved the second one, but I couldn't get anybody to actually try it; everybody flocked Final Fantasy IX instead, regardless of the fact that FF9 is inferior

Rodney: I haven't actually played the second one

Sara: You haven't? You need to

Rodney: Maybe I'll try it out once our quest is finished, before 2k and I head home

James: Can we get back to our quest?

Rodney: Ok. Lead the way, captain

Stumbling through the maze of mirrors, James slowly lead his group through; taking every left turn they came up to.

Sara: You don't think we'll find any mummies or a place called Vertigo while we're in this maze, do you?

James: Of course not; that's just silly

Rodney: That sounds like the sort of thing you'd read in a story that will never be finished

The group continued their way through the maze; unknowing of how far in they where. After stumbling around for a while, they eventually found themselves on the other side; where they saw a lady waiting for them, who had short blonde hair and was wearing a black kendo robe, with a pair of sheaved Kantana on her belt.

Unknown lady: I see you've made it through my maze of mirrors. I'm impressed

Rodney: You'll be even more impressed with us once we've defeated you

Unknown lady: Is that a challenge?

James: Of course it is; we know you're the 3rd member of the Guardians of the 4 Disks, so you have what we're after

Unknown lady: So, you're the group that Adam told me about...James, Sara, and...Gardenia? What kind of name is that for a boy?

Rodney: Gardenia had to leave the group, so I took her place. By the way, I'm Pentium Mitsumi; the Director

Sara (whispering): I knew that name would come back to haunt you eventually...

Rodney (whispering): Well, I didn't expect to transform again so soon

Unknown lady: Why would she have to leave in the middle of your adventure, anyway?

Rodney: She got called into work

Unknown lady: Somehow, I think you're lying...but that's irrelevant now; for I shall stop you from obtaining the disk

Sara: Are you going to introduce yourself before battle? It's only right that we know the name of the person we're about the kick the butt of

Unknown lady: If you must know, I am Jude; the country girl

James: If you're a "country girl" like you claim, than why are you dressed like you're from Japan, instead of like a cowgirl?

Jude: Japan's a country, isn't it?

Rodney: Let's just get this fight started; before we get any further off topic...

Jude: Fine by me

Drawing the longer of the two swords, she assumed a fighting stance; as James got out his Boomerang Blade, Sara got out her mallet, and Rodney got out his Crystal Sword. Making the first move, Jude charged in and attacked James; catching him off-guard and preventing him from effectively using his Boomerang Blade.

Jude: Your boomerang isn't so useful in close range, is it?

As she pinned James into a corner and prepared to finish him off, she was struck on the side full force with Sara's mallet; throwing her roughly a foot to the right.

Sara: His boomerang blade may not be useful in close range, but my mallet is

Jude: I'm not done yet

As she staggered to her feet and assumed a fighting stance, Rodney rushed in quickly and knocked her sword out of her hands and quickly snatched it up.

Rodney: You're finished; you have no further way to defend yourself

Jude: You forgot about my second Kantana

Drawing the shorter of the two swords, she prepared to attack. However, because she was still shaken up from that last attack from Sara, she wasn't quite able to aim properly; as, in an effort to run Rodney through, she missed him by a good 2 feet and wound up getting her sword stuck in the plywood covering where a broken window was.

Rodney: As I said earlier, you're finished; you have no further way to defend yourself, nor are you in any shape to continue fighting

Jude: I give; you're better than I expected. Go ahead and take the disk

The disk then appeared out of nowhere in front of James, who quickly took it and put it into his pocket

James: Do you know how these disks are able to materialize out of nowhere like this?

Jude: Adam said it involved a wizard...I think he's making that up, though; there's likely some advanced technology backing it

Rodney: Or, it could actually be a wizard. You'd believe anything if you've seen what I've seen...

Jude: Like what?

Rodney: I wish I had the time to tell you, but I'm kind of in a hurry

Jude: All right. Maybe our paths will cross again...

As Jude sat down on the bench to recover from the battle, Rodney proceeded to give her back the sword he took, before rejoining his group; who where heading back to their go-karts.

Sara: It looks like our quest is almost over

James: We just need one more disk to complete the map Rodney's working on

Rodney: I'll add the new portion of the map once we return to base

As they stepped outside, they found things had gotten much worse outside; their go-karts where hijacked by some crazy people who where doing donuts in the parking lot, banging their heads to the music of Simon & Garfunkel. Not far away, they saw a group of 3 sanity-sucking robots coming their way; sensing that there where people who where still sane in the area.

Robot #1: Sanity detected in 3 units directly southeast

Robot #3: Exterminate sanity!

James: Should we run?

Rodney: Of course; what else is there to do?

Sara: Where are we going to run to?

Rodney: Back to the base

The group then took off running toward the base; cutting through the woods on the way to lose the robots that where chasing them. As they ran through the woods, seeing a small shack not too far away, they happen to stumble right into a trap; getting caught in a gigantic net, as the person who set the trap rose up from a pile of leaves; revealing herself to be none other than Mary.

Mary: I'm sorry, but you're progressing through your quest much too fast; I'm afraid I'm going to have to stop you now

Sara: How did you even know we where going to cut through the woods, anyway?

Mary: Wild guess. Anyway, now I am going to ensure that you'll never complete your quest by leaving you for the sanity-sucking robots to find

Rodney: You better not have done anything to harm 2k

Mary: Who cares? Soon enough, your sanity will be stripped from you, and your cares about this "2k-tan" will fade away; you wouldn't even care if I killed her

Rodney: I'm going to find some way to stop you, no matter what

Mary: Such powerful words coming from someone who will soon be seeing talking fire hydrants...it's such a waste, really; you'd make an excellent ally, but you've sealed your fate already. Farewell...

As Mary teleported out of there, the sanity-sucking robots had caught up to the group; which quickly moved in and placed their toilet plunger-shaped arms on the heads of their victims and prepared to absorb the sanity.

Robot #2: Preparing for sanity extermination...

James: Farewell guys; been nice knowing you

Sara: I can't believe we fell for the oldest trick in the book

Rodney: It can't end here; I can't leave 2k-tan to die

In a swift move, Rodney pulled an arrow out of his quiver and used the sharp edge of it to cut the ropes; setting them free and throwing off the robots.

Rodney: Here's our chance; now let's get them!

Next time, they fight off the robots, as they make their way to the location of the final disk...

[Nichi]

Since it's Christmas weekend, I decided to give everyone the gift of a new chapter of Tales of Insanity

Chapter 5: Remembrance of the Sanity-Sucking Robots that happen to look like Daleks

The group then drew their weapons and prepared to fight the robots; ready to fight for their sanity.

Sara: How should we go about defeating them?

Rodney: Aim for the eyepiece

Sara: Wouldn't attacking the middle make more sense?

Rodney: Attacking the eyepiece is more effective. Trust me on this

Sara: All right

With great power, Sara began to viciously attack one of the robots with her mallet; breaking off the eyepiece and damaging the ray gun and the toilet plunger arm, rendering it a harmless yard decoration; an ugly one, but one that's at least cooler than a garden gnome. Before she could move onto the next one, James had already taken out it's eyepiece with a well aimed throw of his Boomerang Blade, while Rodney effortlessly disabled a third one in a flash of the blade.

James: Well, that worked a lot better than I expected

Sara: Where did you even get the idea to aim for the eyepiece from?

Rodney: From watching a lot of Doctor Who. After all, the sanity-sucking robots are obviously based on the Daleks, carrying the same strengths and weaknesses

Sara: I haven't actually watched any Doctor Who; I've been interested, though

Rodney: Well, you'll have to watch some after our quest is finished

James: Can we get back to the base now?

Rodney: All right

The group continued their trek through the woods; keeping their weapons drawn just in case anything sneaks up on them. Within about 10 minutes or so, they where back at their base; as Rodney got right onto bringing up the information on where the final disk is hiding.

James: You seem to be in a hurry to finish this quest

Rodney: Of course; not only is the fate of 2k-tan hanging in the balance, but Adam's sanity-sucking robots are roaming free out there

James: Didn't we destroy those robots?

Rodney: Only a few of them; not enough to stop them, but enough to slow their progress while we get the last disk. Speaking of, the last disk is located in the local museum

James: All right...how are we going to get there without our go-karts?

Rodney: We could just walk there

James: One does not simply walk to the museum; it's on the opposite side of town, where we'd have to cross multiple busy intersections to get there, not to mention the sanity-sucking robots we'll likely encounter

Rodney: Well, do you have a better idea? We don't have the go-karts, nor do I have my magic bus to get us there

James: I don't know...can't we just find some turbo-charged bicycles lying around?

Sara: Let's just walk there; it's not like we have a choice at this point

Reluctantly, James agreed to go on foot; as the group made a long journey to the local museum. They saw a few sanity-sucking robots in the distance, as well as the aftermath of their wrath; such as a guy claiming that were-ferrets from space are coming to take everyone to a Nirvana concert. It took them a good hour to finally arrive at their destination, but they finally arrived just as the sun set and the night rolled in. Standing in the front yard of the museum, looking at the ominous 3-story building that stood before them, the group prepared to enter...when; they noticed that Rodney had started to glow again.

Sara: Transforming again?

Rodney: Yeah. This won't take long...

Like every time before, he was engulfed by the light; one which lit up the front of the building quite well. Wither they where trying to make a stealthy entrance or not was moot by this point; as anybody who was inside the building knew that they had visitors.

James: $10 says he'll transform into a walrus

Sara: All right; I counter-bet $10 that he'll turn into a penguin

James: Deal

As the two shook hands on the deal they just made, they watched as the light died down; revealing that Rodney had turned into a strange purple, peg-legged penguin, with tiny bat wings on it's back, a stitching pattern where the white belly meets the purple body, and what looked like a gigantic fanny pack worn in front. As all of this was happening, James reluctantly handed Sara a $10 bill for winning the bet.

Rodney: I feel a little weird, dood

James: Rodney...you're turning into a penguin. Stop it

Rodney: I've turned into a penguin?

He then walks over the conveniently placed mirror to take a look at himself. Why, exactly, a mirror would be left in front of a museum for no real reason at all, we may never know, but hey; this is one that can easily be hand-waved as being done by some random person after having their sanity removed by those robots that are roaming around the town. Anyway, Rodney noticed what he had become; not just an ordinary penguin, but...

Rodney: I'm a Prinny, dood! That explains why I keep saying "dood" a lot

Sara: Ok...what's a Prinny?

Rodney: Oh yeah; that game won't exist for another year...

Sara: What one?

Rodney: Disgaea: Hour of Darkness

Sara: Never heard of it

Rodney: It's a new game from the people behind Rhapsody: A Musical Adventure, dood. You've heard of that one, right?

Sara: Unfortunately, yes...

James: Of course I have! That was quite possibly the greatest RPG of all time; far superior to Persona 2

Sara: Rhapsody wasn't bad, but it's certainly not in the same league as Persona 2

Rodney: Can we get back on track here?

James: Ok...

Rodney: Now, let's head inside and get that disk, dood!

The group then walked dramatically up the stairs and through the front doors of the building; finding themselves in the middle of a long hallway, with staircases going up and down on either side of the building. However, there was absolutely nothing in the hallways; even the big, heavy display cases that where full of historic artifacts, which James and Sara both remember from their school's field trip here earlier in the year, where missing. As the group began to wonder around, the front door slams shut and locks; as if to tell them they cannot escape...also, because it's a common cliché in situations such as this.

James: Something is definitely going on...

Sara: Whoever is waiting for us probably already knew we where coming; with the bright light let off by Rodney's transformation and all

Rodney: It's at times like this I wish I still had control over it, dood

James: Where should we try going?

Rodney: The auditorium

James: What makes you guess that?

Rodney: I have this feeling somebody's waiting in there for us, dood...

The group then walks down the hall and through the double doors that lead into the auditorium. The room, which was well lit, had large windows on seemingly every wall in the room, as well as a large stage and even a balcony with some antiquated seating. As the group reached the center of the room, the lights suddenly turned off; the room only being lit by the light of the full moon outside. Not long after the lights went out, they heard a voice coming from above; possibly in the balcony.

Unknown person: I see you three finally made it. After hearing about how far you've come in your quest, I was looking forward to the moment when you'd happen to stumble into my territory; for that would be the day when your journey comes to an end

Sara: Who are you?

Unknown person: I am Mr. Jack; the Dark Soul. Soon enough, you'll realize that there is a reason to be afraid of the dark...

With the lights still out, Jack rushed at the group; catching them off-guard and managing to get in several quick attacks from every angle. Eventually, the attacks began to decrease in number, but they could still sense he was running around them really fast; keeping them from reaching the light switch.

James: How are we supposed to fight someone we can't see?

Rodney: We first need him to back off so someone can hit the lights, dood

Sara: How are we supposed to do that?

Rodney: I need somebody to throw, drop, or trip me; so I'll explode and knock him off balance

Sara: Wait...you can explode?

Rodney: In this form, yes; the Prinny is known for exploding when thrown or handled roughly, dood

Sara: But wouldn't exploding kill you?

Rodney: At the very worst, yes; however, I have a feeling it'll probably just force another transformation

James: Are you sure it'll just be another transformation?

Rodney: I'm almost certain of it

James: Also, doesn't talking about this with the villain running around us really fast, occasionally getting in a quick blow, allow him to hear our master plan and take precautionary counter-measures to ensure our plan fails?

Sara: Good point

Rodney: That's one thing I don't know the answer of, dood

James: Also, what if we get caught in the explosion?

Rodney: Then, you should throw me at the light switch; turning it on might weaken him

James: All right...

He then picks up the small, penguin-like being and holds it over his head; ready to throw it. Before throwing, he asks one last question to it

James: Are you absolutely sure that this isn't going to kill you?

Rodney: I already said, I'm certain it'll just result in another transformation

James: What if you're wrong?

Rodney: In which case, you have permission to quote the "dead parrot" sketch at my funeral, dood

James: All right; let's do this!

With great strength, James threw Rodney, still in Prinny form, across the room; as the two could only watch him hit the light switch on the wall with enough force to cause him to explode into colorful sparks, like a firecracker; leaving the empty, slightly charred Prinny body lying on the floor. As shocking as it was, you had to admit it was pretty. With the lights turned on, they where finally able to see Mr. Jack; which, all they could really tell was that he's dressed in ninja garb and that he seemed to have been weakened by the light.

Mr. Jack: You're cleverer than anyone I've fought before; nobody seemed to figure out that I draw my power from the shadows, resulting in too many easy victories. Now, I feel like I finally have a reason to show off my true potential; in the darkness and the light

Sara: Show us what you've got; after what we had to do to get the lights back on, an epic battle is in order

Quickly, James and Sara got out their weapons and prepared for battle against Mr. Jack; who had a question before the fight can begin.

Mr. Jack: Where, exactly, do you hide your weapons when they're not in use?

Sara: Don't you know? All heroes wear jeans with absurdly big pockets

Mr. Jack: All right...now, let's fight

Moving very quickly, but not quite as quick as before, Mr. Jack began to rapidly attack the group; as James and Sara began to try and block his attacks, since they could better see what was going on now. As this was happening, Sara caught a glimpse of the charred Prinny lying on the floor beginning to glow; indicating that everything is going according to plan, as Rodney is transforming as a result of exploding.

Mr. Jack: This is starting to get boring...

He then let up his attacks and stepped back; as he began to glow.

Mr. Jack: Now, I'll make things more interesting by focusing my energy into a powerful attack that'll obliterate everything in this room except for me. You can stop me from charging this attack with a strong enough blow, but that's only if you can catch me...

He then began to glow, as he continued to move around the room very quickly; dodging every single attack that James and Sara could dish out. However, he wasn't expecting a surprise attack, in the form of a simple punch to the shoulder, delivered by a person who he was sure was not there earlier; a guy roughly the same age as Rodney, wearing a brown longcoat with a flannel shirt underneath and a plain black t-shirt underneath that, a pair of glasses much like what Rodney wears, and a brown fedora. Said attack, although weak, was just enough to cause him to lose concentration; disrupting the charging process.

Unknown person: Blowing up the entire room, killing everyone except you? That's not how you make a fight more interesting; that's just a cheap path to victory

Mr. Jack: If you know so much about this sort of thing, than who are you?

Unknown person: I am known by many names, like how right now, I'm a clone of Linkara, but one thing has remained consistent; I am still Rodney McIntosh, the Director

Mr. Jack: But...wasn't the Director a girl wearing a maid costume?

Rodney: I'd explain this to you in detail, but I don't think that'd help you at all. There's no sense in wasting more time, so let's just get this battle started

Mr. Jack: Not before I give a clichéd speech about how I'm superior to you in every way; throwing in an insult directed toward your girlfriend to press your berserk button in an attempt to get you to come flying at me with weapons drawn, as I stand there with my arms spread out and say "Come at me, bro". Allow me to begin...

Sara: How about no, Scott...

In a swift move, she struck Mr. Jack with her mallet; knocking him out cold from the force of the attack. Shortly after, the disk appeared out of nowhere in front of her, as she quickly took it.

Sara: Why doesn't anybody ever think to attack the villain while they're too busy giving "the reason you suck" speech?

Rodney: You have a point, although some may say it's not very heroic to do something like that. Anyway, we now have all 4 disks

James: Our quest is almost finished!

Rodney: Now, let's head back to the base

James: One does not simply walk back--

Rodney: We're not going over this again; walking is our only option. Our go-karts and my magic bus where stolen, remember?

James: Couldn't we call a cab this time?

Rodney: Do you know how expansive taxi service is?

James: Ok...but what if we encounter any of those robots?

Rodney: I think we can handle them

James (disappointed): Ok...

The group then proceeded to leave the auditorium and the museum; stepping back outside. Once outside, they noticed that the street lights where out; the only light in the area was from the full moon shining through the branches and leaves of the oak trees. As they carefully walked around, they where confronted by a mysterious person; his face was obscured by the shadows, but they could see that he was wearing a leather jacket and black denim jeans.

Unknown person: I see you've managed to defeat all of the Guardians of the 4 Disks...I'm impressed; I would have never expected you to pull it off

James: I'd recognize that voice anywhere...what are you doing here, Adam?

Unknown person: I'm just here to make my presence known, and to inform you that your quest isn't over yet; you'll have a series of challenges to make your way past once you arrive at my fortress, before you'll get the chance to fight me

Rodney: With the world's sanity on the line, as well as Nichi, failure is not an option at this point

Adam: We'll see about that. I'll be waiting at my fortress for your arrival...

He then walks away into the night, as Sara led the group back to the base; to study the final disk and prepare for the next phase of their mission.

Next time, the group heads off toward Adam's fortress...but before that, something a little more seasonal; with Director Who: Episode 2512: The Obligotory Christmas Episode

[Nichi]

Regardless of technical issues on my end, the show must go on! So, sit down, grab a cup of eggnog, and enjoy Director Who: Episode 2512: The Obligatory Christmas Special

It was an average mid-December day at the mansion, as Rodney, 2k-tan, and Yendor where relaxing with cups of apple cider, now that they have finished decorating the tree for the Christmas party that night. Although the room looked nice, with a fully decorated tree with the classic Microsoft Windows logo on top in place of a star, as well as a fruitcake set ablaze in the fireplace (It was cheaper than a Yule log), something just didn't seem right; primarily about the weather. Although it was cold like it was supposed to be, it was starting to snow; something highly unusual for the area.

Rodney: It's snowing? You mean, we'll possibly have one of those fabled white Christmases?

Yendor: Is there even such a thing as a white Christmas?

2k-tan: Yes, there is. I remember having a snowball fight with Emmy and Saseko one Christmas morning, many years ago...

Rodney: That must have been nice. I've never actually had a snowball fight before

2k-tan: You haven't?

Rodney: Of course not. It's always been a little less "White Christmas" and a little more "Green Hell" in the places I've gone to

2k-tan: All right then. Everybody grab your coats, because it's about to go down

After saying that, the 3 took off for their rooms quickly to get equipped with the dusty winter wear they almost never use, before meeting in the land of the ice and snow that was the backyard.

Upon arriving outside, Rodney was equipped with snow boots, thick denim jeans, a black shirt, some lightweight leather gloves, and a white longcoat that helped him camouflage with the snowy surroundings, while 2k-tan was equipped with a long, buttoned-up light blue coat, light blue gloves, tan snow pants, snow boots, and an orange scarf, and Yendor was dressed in a similar way to 2k, except with a tan coat and a ridiculously long multi-colored scarf that went down almost to her feet.

2k-tan: All right, does anybody need explanation on how a snowball fight works?

Rodney: Of course not

Yendor: I may have never had a snowball fight, but it's not like you need a degree in theoretical physics to understand how to have one

2k-tan: All right then...let's begin. One hit, last one standing

With that being said, everybody quickly scooped up snow, rolled it up, and engaged in battle; 2k-tan effortlessly ducking and rolling away from everyone's attacks while preparing a counterattack of her own, as Yendor was quickly taken out with a surprise attack from Rodney. As she left, it came down to an epic showdown between the two remaining participants; both where effortlessly dodging each others attacks, as if they could read their opponent's mind. As this raged on for several minutes, they where eventually caught off guard by a surprise attack that took both of them out.

As they looked to their right to see who it was, they saw none other than Yendor bringing Celeron "PentiumMMX" Wily and his wife, Crystal, to join them; Pentium still sporting the same short black hair as always, wearing his trademark green sports jacket, thick blue gloves, blue denim jeans, and black sneakers, while Crystal was wearing a white hooded sweatshirt with blue snow pants, and with her blue hair worn in a braid.

Crystal: You weren't going to leave us out, where you?

Rodney: Actually, we where just passing the time until you arrived. I didn't think you'd arrive until later. So, how've things been going?

PentiumMMX: Quite well, actually. We moved into our new house, things have been going well for me at work, while Crystal got a job as a lab aide

Crystal: It may not be as exciting as a wild adventure to save the world, like we used to have, but it's better than nothing

PentiumMMX: So, has anything happened since we moved?

Rodney: A few things, yeah

Yendor (with a grin on her face): We have photos of one thing that happened...

Crystal: Oh really? What happened, then?

Rodney (blushing): I-it was nothing! Disregard what she said!

2k-tan: Oh come on; I didn't get around to posting those pictures online, so can't I just show them now?

PentiumMMX: This sounds interesting...

Crystal: Agreed

Yendor: You don't want to disappoint your guests, do you?

Rodney: Dammit....fine; I would have preferred for those pics to remain private, but go ahead and show them

The group then went back into the mansion, as they sat down in the room with the tree to drink some eggnog and look at the semi-embarrassing photos that where taken following that random encounter with Pleinair earlier in the year; the one that everybody though was the best featured Rodney in a fancy green dress with puffy sleeves and long white gloves, wringing his hands while looking down to his right and blushing, while 2k-tan stood beside him in her usual clothing, with her right arm around him, a goofy smile on her face, and giving the victory sign with her left hand.

Crystal: You actually look pretty good in that dress, but I think you could look more convincing with some help...Yendor, are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Yendor: I think so, Crystal, but why doesn't the audio match up with the video in Godzilla movies?

Crystal: No, what I mean is that we should do his hair and makeup to make him more convincing. Also, for effect, have 2k wearing the same dress

2k-tan (annoyed): What?

Crystal: I'm thinking of taking a picture of you and Rodney in matching dresses. You two would look good!

2k-tan: If you tried wearing a dress like that, your opinion would change quickly; I could barely move my arms in that damn thing

Rodney: I'm with her on this

Crystal: Oh come on; comfort isn't the point here. Now, come with us and we'll get both of you dolled up...

She, along with Yendor, began to move ever closer to Rodney and 2k; as the two began to consider their options for escape.

2k-tan: I'm beginning to regret showing her those pictures...

Rodney: 2k, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

2k-tan: Run like hell?

Rodney: Exactly

Yendor: Oh, you're no fun anymore...

The two then took off quick as the flash for the backdoor, running toward Storage Building 12, as Yendor and Crystal then took off in pursuit, while PentiumMMX stayed behind in the mansion; finishing his cup of eggnog.

PentiumMMX: Ah, some things never change...

Upon finishing, he set the cup down on the table, before running off outside to see what everyone else was up to.

-The End-

Tomorrow, Tales of Insanity continues with chapter 6

[Bella]

Hooray stories! : D

[Nichi]

You know the part mentioning the picture of Rodney and 2k together? I'd love to see someone draw that ^_^
hint-hint