What's your gender?

[SleepyD]

Now, getting to the point of this rant of mine (besides clarifying that those of you that feel you are sensitive or like beautiful thing are, but the poles intention, not mentally female)  Those perceptive types may have already figured it out…
I am biologically male, mentally female.  I am a MTF transsexual. (Oh god I’m turning into mootkins -_-) That’s right, the Cap’n, the loud mouth male chauvinist pig (no offence c-chan) is in fact, a girl.  

Hopefully, you all will come to accept me for who I’m trying to be and mention of what I used to be will disappear into the past posts and new members don’t really need to know.  Like I said, passing is also being subtle and not waving the fact around.

I never thought that you were a chauvinist in any way, I took what you call jokes as jokes. ^^  I may have stated that I have more feminine tendencies myself.  Sometimes I have this feeling that people think I'm gay... but I'm straight.  Just a really sensitive straight guy. hah Nothing wrong with being gay, mind.  

If anyone's ever heard of the Myers-Briggs personality test, I consistently end up being typed as INFP in online tests, which is exactly the opposite of what modern Western society would call an ideal man, an ESTJ. (INFP=Introverted, iNtuitive, Feeling, Perceiving; ESTJ=Extraverted, Sensing, Thinking, Judging) (A good description of the INFP: http://www.geocities.com/lifexplore/infp.htm It's a bit long, but I relate a lot to what is said in that.)

What I find interesting is that only 1% of the male population type as INFP... makes for a lonely world when few people can see the things the way you do. But.... you adapt, somehow.  But I digress.

First off, the apology I mentioned.  I feel terribly sorry for any hurt feelings that anyone had from my male chauvinist remarks.  Like I said, it’s a learned habit from the military that I’m trying hard to shake.  (I’ve only been out for like 8 months now don’t you know) Especially the jokes about “no girls on the internets” and the like that I know Kami-tux was especially offended by.  I know I’ve made a lot of “trap” jokes as well and the like.  They were, as I said earlier, simply jokes and well… cover story.  While I was still pretending to be male, the last person to be accused of being a girl or trap would be the one that is always making jokes about them.    I made offensive jokes as a cover story to avoid ridicule, and again, for that I am sorry.  

While I don't often make such jokes, I did go to an all-boys high school for 4 years, and have been exposed to many such jokes.  I knew these people pretty well, and I did recognize that these people don't really mean what they said.  I feel the same way with what you have said.  

Now some explanation… As some of you are still trying to put the pieces together because at first it doesn’t seem to make sense.  I like I mentioned before, have always even as a little kid, wanted nothing more then to be a girl.  Heck, I picked on my little sister as kids because I was so jealous/envious of how she was treated or the things she was given.  Before high school I was the quiet geek wearing plain clothes sitting in the back of the class and talked to no one.  Gentle as can be, loved cats and romance stories and all that.  Heck the GI Joes my parents bought me I played house with my sister and her Barbies (they were the insanely tall wives of the brave soldiers!). It was in high school I decided to try to “lean to be a guy” by joining the most manly of professions, the United States Marine Corps, and to top it of, insisted on infantry even though I tested well enough to be a military nuclear engineer.

Haha.... interesting.  cuz... you're not the only one who played house with sisters involving barbie dolls... ^^;  And I did have thoughts that I should have been born a girl.  
I never felt that I fit in with people back in elementary/middle school. I was the awkward, nerdy, nice guy. Never really made good friends during that time in my life. In high school, I found a group of similarly nerdy people with whom I could be myself.  That was the turning point in my life.

I spent 5 years in the military, trying to be as hardcore rough and tough as you can be.  I seem to have learned to play the part pretty well because even online I have a reputation of being the male chauvinist.  It was all an act, well most of it.  I did develop an obsession with guns (though even as a kid my idols were the strong girls with guns such as Samus Aran, or Riply from Aliens.  Weak screaming defenseless girls bug me a bit -_-)

hm... no real deep thoughts here... these did come to mind:
1) Mentioned this earlier, but I like to think I've seen through that act
2) I on the other hand have developed an obsession with military aircraft since high school... can't own one though. haha
3) Weak screaming defenseless girls bug me too.  And kick-ass girls rock. But independent and nerdy girls are cool too. :3

As you all are part of my life currently and a part I enjoy very much, that’s why I’m sharing this embarrassing story with you all.  Please bear with me as I attempt to shake off 5 years of military and the trained behaviors it gave me as I begin transitioning to a kinder gentler me. For the time being I’ll keep my name as it is the “cap’n” as well women can be cap’ns too.  Ill spare you all a picture of me, but I’m told I’m a pretty freaking cute girl ^_^

Well, I hope all of this makes sense to you all and hasn’t freaked or weirded you out.  

Oh and I guess my obsession with 3.1sama would seem a bit weird now being a girl.  Ill just remind everyone about my “I’m a lesbian trapped in a mans body” joke I made when this thread started.  Well, I was serious. Well not totally.  I like guys but still think man smex is gross so I didn’t mention it before (damn you lily!  You have forced Kyon away from the straight path! Bring him back!).  But as a girl, thinking male character are cute is alright.

*sits and stares and waits*

well, sir, you're a good guy.  And I think it's pretty cool that you're sharing this.  I'm a very accepting person, sometimes to a fault. ^^; SleepyD has no problem with this post and believes you should keep your position as a mod. In fact, I think this post makes you more qualified to be a mod.... can't really put into words why.... a feeling I guess. ehe ^^;

[Pitkin]

Welcome to society, my friend. ^_^

However, I have one objection. T_T Drag queen isn't a sexual term; drag queen is by definition a man who dresses extravagantly feminine (eg. as part of a drag show or competition, usually humorous), not intending to a) pass as a woman or b) hit on anyone. Similar term for a woman who dresses up as a guy for performance is of course a drag king. :p Well, the definitions can always be argued about. ^^;

Nevertheless, congratulations for your courage, Captain! I have to admit, reading your post made me shake. You're one of those kick-ass girls yourself! ^__^

Oh, one more thing: not a valid reason for resignation, so don't even think about it.

[Bella]

I have to say that's incredible brave of you, Captain. I really admire, but would never, ever, expect, that kind of openness...You just gained a ton of respect in my mind.

I've met chauvinists before; (while I don't believe in hate,) I dislike them with an utmost passion. And let me tell you, they think women are below their level, almost subhuman. A few jokes do not make you a chauvinist, and I never thought such of you.

[NejinOniwa]

Well. I believe I heard this (not as elaborate, though) as well from you WAY back over private in the IRC channel, so it's not as shocking for me, I guess. (Too bad I can't find the log file - or was I clumsy enough NOT to log it? Ah nevermind, but I do think it was some back in spring, april perhaps.)
As thus, with that knowledge in the back of my head, I've never been able to think of you as a chauvinist of any kind. While I have been having idealistic and subjective conflicts with you on other subjects, some things remain deep-down, and some things touch me deeply as well. And truth be said: If I was gay (now I ain't - I think - but apparently a lot of people THINK I am), I would have hurriedly hoisted my rainbow flag this very moment and openly started my journey on the great seas with it raised. (As said, though, I am not, so let's leave that aside for now.)
Also I would like to quote Pitkin-dono: Reading your post made me shake.
Of pride.

With all that being said, I have two last things to proclaim:
First of all, I hope we see more of this side of you - liking it more and more already! - in the future.

Secondly...
Welcome back, Milady.

[Pitkin]

And truth be said: If I was gay (now I ain't - I think - but apparently a lot of people THINK I am), I would have hurriedly hoisted my rainbow flag this very moment and openly started my journey on the great seas with it raised. (As said, though, I am not, so let's leave that aside for now.)
Also I would like to quote Pitkin-dono: Reading your post made me shake.
Of pride.

With all that being said, I have two last things to proclaim:
First of all, I hope we see more of this side of you - liking it more and more already! - in the future.

Secondly...
Welcome back, Milady.

Just need to say this: well said, Nejin-san.

Yet, for myself, hoisting any flags are reserved for gay pride, not for collective coming out parties. Cheers. ^^

[NejinOniwa]

Just need to say this: well said, Nejin-san.

Yet, for myself, hoisting any flags are reserved for gay pride, not for collective coming out parties. Cheers. ^^

Thanks, Pitkin-san!

But for a man of my ways, I rather often hoist flags all over. S'got something to do with being a long-time sailor, ya'know.
(FGDS NEJIN IS NOT JUST A NET PIRATE! HELP!)
To end it all in all savvyness:
Cheers, mate, and drink up; me hearties, drink up, yo-ho!

[CaptBrenden]

*twitch twitch*

I had a long replie to all of that that I had typed up in word... and then I copied it and closed word without saving.. went to paste.. and apperently word cleared the clipboard.. Im very upset/vexed right now -_-

Ill go back and re type it later when im less vexed, but Ill abriviate it to:

Thank you all for the support.

oh and, I posted in free cookies, but it was missunder stood by the one person that commented on it...



far less creepy then thurosis version... -_-

[davedson111]

I picked the one that is a boy.

[Rikkuzia]

>__> I'm very female in both mindset and body.

[nagato]

Male in mind and body

[Smokey]

Tough question, im physx a man but women are well lovable and great overall, so.... tough one

[NejinOniwa]

Tough question, im physx a man but women are well lovable and great overall, so.... tough one

THAT'S CALLED A NORMAL HETERO, MAH BOI!!! -w-

[Smokey]

doesn't make the question any easier...although i'd have a go at being a woman if it were for a day or so, but overall men are better off (menstrual cycle, giving birth)...

[Dos]

Sorry that a lie man go thou they only vs of  menstrual cycle and  giving birth
-dos

[CaptBrenden]

humm right now 69 voted boy boy... allll rrrrriiigghht... giggidy giggidy!

curious tho.. I wonder who the macho girls are that selected physicly girl, mentaly boy are.  I dont recall any of them anouncing such...