Relationships

[Nichi]

I think you're a pretty cool guy. You're usually very relaxed and understanding, and it feels genuine :3

Which, I enjoy talking to you when you're on Skype

[alfonso_rd_30]

you seem a nice guy... yet our interaction has ben minimal so I can't do a thoroughly analyzes with the ammount of data impuetd

[Chocofreak13]

i don't know you well enough to get an accurate impression. if we chatted over skype, i'd be able to paint a better picture. from what i HAVE seen from you, though, overall you seem like an intelligent, good person, but not someone i can relate to well. as stated, this is likely because i don't know you well enough. but at times i feel a bit intimidated considering you seem to have more knowledge of certain subjects than i do. we'd be closer friends if we talked more.


also, i'm pretty cynical. growing up surrounded by a disillusioned, depressing reality and dealing with severe depression myself has made me pretty cold to the world. the stuff i do every day, talking to friends, going online, curling up with my plushies to watch tv/make art/play a game/etc is what keeps me going at all since it's all the happiness i have left.

[Simonorged]

I'm curious now, what do you guys think of me?

As for as what I think of you, you seem nice and honest, like what you say reflects who you are.

And now for something I discussed with SleepyD,

Spoiler: ShowHide

I'm in a bit of a tight spot here, there is a girl in my class that I've fallen in love with and she knows this and openly accepts my affections. I want to have sex with her, she knows this also. Problem, I CAN'T! I'm so confused. I've never felt this strongly about anyone before and now that the feeling are now mostly mutual, I constantly afraid that I might hurt her some how if I ever really got the chance. I want to love her, and love her, but it seems I'll only be able to love her in truth, rather then in bed.

I want her heart for my own, but it's not mine to take.

First question: are you seeking advice, or are you just venting?

If you are seeking advice, I'm going to need some details as to why you can't move towards the next step?
"Might hurt her" is kinda vague.

If you aren't and just want someone to relate their experiences, I'll let someone else handle that. ^^;

I was raised to think that any sexual activity can have detrimental affects on personality and emotional states, And while I would never do anything to physically hurt her, I'm not exactly a light weight.
And as far as why not, she is happily with some one else. I've been around her for the last six months and have gotten to know her very well, more than anything she just likes to "play" although I hadn't had a chance to get close enough until recently, and while I wish she could be just mine, that's not going to happen. I'm pretty much dog loyal to her at this point.

And it's both venting and advice requests, even though I know pretty much all the possible responses.
Relating experiences would likely help.

I have a big heart, but I'm not very smart.

Well, coming from a religious background, I do hold sexual activity as something that shouldn't be a casual undertaking.
And so it seems you are smitten with a girl already taken. ah...

I can't really give much advice other than, if she's happy where she's at, then I'd leave it be. Stay friends and enjoy her company. If it /is/ a mutual feeling (and you best be sure about that), then she will decide when to break up with her current partner on her own terms--I wouldn't put any pressure.

You can take all that with a grain of salt, I don't know the exact circumstances, nor do I know how strong your feelings are. I think the more general advice here is to be patient and bide your time for now. Trust that an opportunity will present itself.

And I'm thinking this should go in the Relationships thread, so feel free to move it there if you like.

Extroverted (E) 53.33% Introverted (I) 46.67%
Intuitive (N) 58.33% Sensing (S) 41.67%
Feeling (F) 51.35% Thinking (T) 48.65%
Judging (J) 55.56% Perceiving (P) 44.44%

Your type is: ENFJ

ENFJ - "Persuader". Outstanding leader of groups.
Can be aggressive at helping others to be the best that they can be.
2.5% of total population.

[Nichi]

You seem like a nice guy to me, what little I've talked to you :3

On what Kari mentioned about being cynical, sometimes I feel I've become that way just a bit; entirely because of mom and her side of the family. Like, my dad's side of the family is genuinely caring and accepting, while mom's side has that as a facade; on the surface they seem caring and accepting, but underneath that sparkly cover they're very hateful and intolerant of anything outside their narrow-minded view of the norm, and they won't hesitate to cut ties to someone who does something they disagree with (For example, my oldest cousin was disowned because she married a black man). A majority of the people in my hometown are unfortunately similar in mindset; which makes me feel very uncomfortable and out of place here. I feel like I often have to suppress my actual views and opinions to avoid any problems.

I'll likely be better once I move out of this place and get as far away from it as I can

[Simonorged]

Yeah, you seem to be a very calm and respectable person, if not a bit shy

[Chocofreak13]

i don't really know a thing about you other than you're very passionate in your views, and thankfully have yet to try to convert me. not a bad person by any means, but idk about anything else. ever since the Kriz and Dustii incidents though, i'm very wary of new members, of which i still catagorize you into. >>;

[Nichi]

Urgh, Dustii. He reminds me of myself...more precisely, how I was circa '02; with being a loudmouth obnoxious community-destroying monster. I don't remember ever seeing as much conflict between two certain users  prior to that brat showing up :\

[Chocofreak13]

it's strange, given how you are now. i can't picture you being like that. what community did you break up?

[Nichi]

It was a Sonic the Hedgehog hacking community; dedicated to making cool hacks of the old Sega Genesis games in the series. I was an idiot and managed to turn the entire community against me save for the site's admin; which, siding with me resulted in the entire community turning on him and the site dying :\

[Pitkin]

Interesting way to badmouth a person absent, Pentium. If I may remind you, unless I'm gravely mistaken, he was by far not the member using the most toxic language around here. He became a punching bag for liking an OS others considered garbage, and stood up for his opinion. Yes, a terrible community-destroying brat. :/

As for Meyer-Briggs, my results vary from one time to another, the N and P staying while I/E and F/T being too close to call.

Finally, for the OSC members. It's an online community, and feels like it. Has good and bad sides, and that's as far into details as I wish to go.

[Bella]

The one and only thing I can criticize Dustii for is an exceedingly poor sense of "judging his audience", so to speak, and having no idea when to stop. It's certainly wrong to pick on a person because their views differ from your own in a fashion that is almost entirely harmless (in other words - he never advocated racism, sexism, hatred against particular religions or beliefs, etc., simply a preference for a "different" operating system) but people also have to learn that not everyone is going to agree with you, and it's pointless to try to change people's minds on what's essentially a trivial point (favorite OS).  I have difficultly feeling sympathetic for somebody who relentlessly pursued arguments instead of simply "agreeing to disagree" or dropping the point altogether.

As much as I'd love to bust down the proverbial doors of a Windows fandom website and preach the eternal awesomeness of Unix, I know that doing so will get me a ton of criticism, if not outright flaming, and not change anyone's mind about their allegiance. Why even bother?

Granted, the finer points of not being embroiled in online flamewars seems to be lost on younger people (if I had a dime for every online shitstorm I ignited in my tweeens / early teens...), so we probably should have done the mature thing and simply ignored any comments that we didn't like instead of publicly dissecting them sentence-for-sentence.

[Simonorged]

I've shared my views and you all know where I stand. I see no reason to try and convert you.

It may seem weird but I see all of you whom I have had the chance to talk to as friends, when I've said things that were too insulting you've corrected me, when I've shared my heart you were nice to me. I've laughed with and felt sympathy for most of you and while I can seem condescending at times you put up with me. I honestly want to get to know all of you better. As it was well put before, this place is quite the family and I eagerly await everything you all have to say.

And with HBT being my one good contribution I find it an amusing roller coaster. Seeing as that is where I got a feel for who most of you are. Opposing views but hearts of gold.

[NejinOniwa]

It was indeed a bit of an unfortunate occurrence with how the incident with Dustii went down, but I have to agree with bells on this point. His biggest mistake was not knowing when to give it up, simply put. In my eyes he went from "new guy" to "osc member" to "biased osc member" to "guy my friends are getting pissed off at" and finally ending at "this guy must be getting paid by M$ with how much bootlicking he's doing" levels of annoyance. I do not like bootlickers at all, so in the end I wasn't all too sad to see him go - even if it's always a loss when a small community like ours loses someone.

@Simon - that is, I believe, the key to surviving as an internet user outside of Facebook. The willingness to suspend your own zeal (or lack of it in the first place) and accept that in the end all you'll able to accomplish by going all out heated debate mode in a forum is getting yourself banned - understanding, in short, the implications of the fact that the Internet Is Serious Business.

[Simonorged]

I talk to you all here like I talk to my friends IRL, the only difference is I haven't literally met any of you.
In HBT I was going full force.